Friday, March 4, 2011


I was talking with a friend this evening and the word "Expectation" came up.

This reminded me of a conversation I had with a dear friend about a year and a half ago.  I got to spend a lovely day with her and her daughter.  A day filled with laughter, and many conversations.

In the course of our conversation, the word "Expectations" proceeded to intertwine with our words quite a bit.

In the natural course of life we are bombarded with expectations that surround us.  When we are little, we expect our parents to be there for us.  When we are teenagers, we expect everything go our way (I mean, hello, at that point in our life we KNOW everything, right?)

In relationships we eventually have Expectations that, for the most part, are normal.  With our significant other, we expect them to treat us right.  We Expect them to be there for us.  We Expect them to "follow the rules", for lack of a better term when it comes TO the relationship.

Now, obviously, some people tend to have unrealistic expectations.  That's a given.  But for the most part, we have learned, growing up to have expectations.  And a lot of them are just the normal part of life.

But there comes a time when you do have to let certain expectations go in your life.  Sometimes it's just not the way it used to be, or the way you want it to be, and when there becomes a conflict like that in your life, you have to learn to let go of those expectations.   If something happens in your "expectations" and you feel they are not being met, you can do one of two things.

One, you can fight for those expectations, discuss those expectations and/or demand those expectations.  But that's not always a good option.  Sometimes you have to learn to let go.

And B, sometimes, it's also just opening up your eyes and seeing that person for who they are.  Not who you want them to be.  When you can do that, and learn to let go of those expectations, it is such a freeing feeling!   When you can look at someone and think to yourself, "This is who this person is" and not think about trying to change them, or make them into someone they are not, you are a much better person for it, and a tremendous weight has then been lifted off your shoulders.

And sometimes, even "normal" expectations have to be let go as well.

Now, I'm not saying that you should let go of all expectations in your life.  That would be unrealistic.  It's just letting GO of the expectations that are unrealistic or become unrealistic, or are causing conflict in your life, is where you can better your life and psyche for it.

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