That dreaded word........Menopause.
For some, it's a relief. No more periods. At least that's what we all look forward to when we hear the term menopause, right?!
Little do we all know the multitude of other symptoms that come along with it.
First, we women go through what's called "Peri-Menopause". This can last many, many years.
It's what happens when we first starting having irregular periods, and the dreaded "hot flashes" and "night sweats". It truly is a bitch, I tell you.
Oh, and then there's the increased anxiety that comes along with it, as well as an emotional roller coaster like you've never been on.
One time I was having dinner with my daughters and my oldest was talking about something, I can't even remember what it was, but it drew some emotion out to me, and she was like, "You're not going to cry now mom, are you?" And I'm like, "NOOOOO", and of course my eyes started welling up with tears. Literally out of nowhere.
I remember one time my mom was going through it (the few things I do remember about her going through it). My sisters and I thought it would be a nice thing to actually clean up the house and vaccuum like she often asked us to do. So we got in there and vaccuumed the place as best as we could. When she came home, she looked and literally yelled at us "Why didn't you vaccuum like I asked you to!!!" My sisters and I looked at each other dumbfounded. Because we actually DID vaccuum. My mom went outside on the porch, sat there and cried. And then at some point she got up and left in her car! I had no idea where she went and with me being the oldest sister started literally wondering if I would have to go get a job to support me and my sisters because I didn't knnow if she was going to come back! (She did come back). There was a time I had to go to the store to get her pads and tampons because she was literally bleeding through them and ran out. But other than that, I don't remember her talking about it all that much or knowing too much about it. When I went through it, I really wish I had here there to talk to me about it.
I did have my aunt (she is 9 years older than me) but I don't think her journey was that intense.
Who I did have was my friends. Especially my oldest and dearest friend who we have been friends with since we were 10. She had gone through it before I did and when I asked her how she handled the hot flashes she said, "I welcomed them". I was like, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?! Then she explained it to me. She told me that our bodies are meant to go through this cycle in our lives and the more we welcome it, the less intense it would be.
Since that time, when I did have them, I didn't fight them. I didn't get angry or frustrated that I had them. I let them happen. Sure, I had my fans on me (and portable ones with me at all times), and layers of clothing that I could strip off to help me cool down as well as hair ties to put my hair up.
It's been a few years since I was in the midst of them, but I still get them occasionally. I have found that when I get anxious about something, the temperature in my body heats up and I get the occasional hot flash. Nothing like it used to be. (Although summer is coming up, so they may get a little more frequent with the warmer weather).
I've also changed my diet over the years because of it as well. I've learned that sugar can contribute to the hot flashes, so I have cut out a lot of it over the years, plus it's healthier for me as well. (I have IBS but I'll get into that story another time). I also quit drinking. I was NEVER that much of a drinker (unless you count high school and my early 20's) so quitting it was not a hard thing to do. I have a family history over over using alcohol (and even an alcoholic here and there) and it always made me very aware of my drinking. (again, another story for a later time).
I had a uterine ablation in my mid 40's. I had ALWAYS had heavy periods and it got so bad at one point that I had to run to the bathroom every 15 minutes (and of course it happened when I was hosting a baby shower for a friend). That procedure helped me not to have to deal with that anymore going through peri-menopause to the onset of menopause.
When I was in my very early 50's I went 6 months without a period and I was like "YES!" I'm done! And then NOPE! I had another one. Within a year and a half of that, I finally went through the "12 months without a period" and could officially say that I was in menopause. No more periods. Hot flashes, yes, but the periods were gone. No more eggs.
I have realized that with social media nowadays, my generation, (fondly called Generation X) is being so much more vocal about menopause. And the symptoms, and suggestions, and help and more women just talking about it in general. This makes me happy because this means (or at least I hope it will mean) that it won't be a taboo to talk about, and my girls will not be so "left in the dark" when it happens. And they can be prepared (education wise, no one is ever prepared for the roller coaster it takes you on) and the support of doctors and their fellow friends who embark on the journey as well.
Because let's face it, going through ANYTHING alone is not fun (not that going through it with a bunch a friends is a party, but at least they can all commiserate together).
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